Friday, November 4, 2011

In Different Shoes

The surgery is over.  It went well for the surgeon.  He was happy with what he was able to clear out:  1 large 10 centimeter hemangioma, 2 medium hemangiomas and 4 pencil eraser sized hemangiomas.  And now I have been recovering.  Trying all the different cocktails of pain meds.  This is such a familiar feeling as if I have done it before.  But I haven't, I have walked this path with my children but never actually woken up from the general anesthesia unable to talk, never been stuck to get an IV, or moved around by a bunch of strangers, tender, right after surgery. I now know my children better and understand  how they might feel, on some small level.  And for them it may even be scarier because they can not talk or communicate with a stranger their needs.

So now it's me in the hospital bed, sometimes alone, sometimes with those I love surrounding me.  As always it's harder than I thought it would be.  I have hardly spent a moment with my kids, I just haven't been up for it.  Luckily I have an amazing support system that has stepped in right in the nick of time.  Yes I am blessed, but right now all I feel is tired and and a bit nauseated from the pain pills. 

It is true, each day it gets a bit easier. 


Lori J. Isenstadt, IBCLC All About Breastfeeding said...

So happy to learn you came through the surgery.

Andrea Luecke said...

Me too. Very happy to hear you are recovering and that it was benign. you must have been so freaked out leading up to the surgery and diagnosis. You are superwoman. Love, Andrea

tia hil said...

Beautiful reflective piece! xoxo